I was blessed to be with my small group a few nights back, and experience many of their tears over parts of their past, and as they unpacked their story. We believe that a man is called to show both strength, and mercy, and often in the movement towards masculinity, we forget emotion, feelings, and suffering, and showing all of that is walking into the masculine.
I loved what Charlton Clarke, one of the two counselors with us, shared to our group. Sharing your heart, crying is one of the most masculine, manly things you can do. Gosh. Isn't that missing in so much of our understanding of a man.
A man named Richard Rohr says, show me a young man who can weep, and an old man who can laugh.
I am in the presence of brave young men. Eager, and hungry to know their story, and the God who is still writing it. I feel I am on that journey myself. To cry... says... I can't make it better. I can't change what happened. And it hurt. It affected me. I needed something that did not come. Not to blame. Not to push our anger towards someone else. But to sit, and experience the suffering, and sorrow of our sin, a fallen world, and what often happens to us as a result. There was beauty that night, strength in weakness. Tears of sorrow, for joy coming in the morning. I love these young men, and their brave hearts to explore who they are.
Dan Allender says at the length we mourn and weep, is the extent we party, and find joy. and I feel excited to see where we will continue to experience those two extremes, and all that is in between.