Monday, May 04, 2009

Old, Sick, Tired, Creative, Broke.

Most days as I drive to work with Cory (we carpool)there is a man with a wiry gray beard that greets us at our exit off Monument. I don't know his name. But he sits with a cardboard sign. It reads,

OLD SICK
TIRED CREATIVE
BROKE

4 of those words, speak of pain, suffering, hardship. I guess what we might expect in a man asking for money, right? We expect a sad story. But one of them is something very different. This man's dignity. Creative. I have marveled at that sign for the last 9 or so months. Never handed him a dollar, but wondered. What is his story, so that this word remains. It makes me think he hasn't given up. there is something there, waiting to be engaged. It speaks of original glory. of God. of his hands over the six days of creation, of that image into man. what is this man's creativity?

I realized I have never thought to ask. I've been to busy getting to work so that I could create. so that I could start into my day that gives me the opportunity for much of that. and maybe my irony is that instead of holding a sign in my life, that says OLD, SICK, TIRED, CREATIVE, AND BROKE. I sign my signature on my email, Director of Development. which means, I help think through the creation process, and I even have to find money to make that possible. I guess, in some ways, I hold a sign that says only one of those CREATIVE. b/c who the hell wants to give to a dude who is sick, tired, creative, and broke. sadly, I don't want to admit the rest, only the creative part. but its more true than I want to admit. and the old is coming. one way or the other.

Maybe I need to see both the dignity, and depravity a bit more. live in both. hold my sign that confesses the gospel in me, how it delivers on some promises, and a few I have done my part to screw up. and some, I just don't really know what happened, but didn't quite work out the way I thought.

I am not sure, but I have decided to stop and see if I could get him breakfast, maybe pay for my time that he would normally collect some money during the rush hour, and ask him... what does that word mean to him. what does he create. what might he want to create.

I figured if I posted this on here, it will be my accountability. and I can follow up.